Dreams Are Freak

... It is funny to ask to myself and I still find that you are still by far one of my most favorite person out there. Not a single second I spend with you was a time-wasted. I was happy. Well, to tell you the truth, I might be at my happiest state even tho we also went thru many ups and downs. There were cries after cries. But even so, laugh never failed to find a way back to us. And so we laughed. A lot. And I will forever thank you for that. For saving me, especially. But even after your absence, I am happy too. Because now I came into realization that happiness is a choice. So I find happiness in another form, another person. Foods after foods, friends after friends, journeys after journeys. None of them is anything close to you, but well, a person is not meant to be replaced with another, and so you are. I know I should ask for your forgiveness seventy times seven and it could never be enough between us. So, I am sorry. I am really sorry for everything I've d...

I used to say this a lot : I write to be delighted. But nowadays the time when I find myself at my very consciously happy state is when I do a retail therapy. It can be anything. Online shopping. Buying unnecessary clothes. Makeup (ofc). It's kind of fascinating to know that I do really change as an individual. I used to spend a lot of time writing, but now? Not anymore But there's something I also just realized recently, I don't write to be delighted anymore because it feels impossible for having time to do so. But I know I'm just reasoning with my self. In fact, no person is too busy for anything, for anyone. It's all about priority. You can always choose to receive the call from your parents, your lovers, no matter how busy you are, even though you will talk only in one or two minutes, saying "Sorry, I've been very busy lately. I think I can be on the phone only for a while." And to me writing is an essential journey of my life, that ...

Cerita panjang pertama yang berhasil diselesaikan... Ya meskipun makan waktu dua tahun . Akan kangen sekali dengan Kian, Kian Mahisa Campaka. I owe you so much, Kian. ***                  Untuk Charlene yang selalu penasaran, konvensional, dan cerewet,            Kabarku di sini baik—hampir tidak tahu kalau ada orang yang masih berkomunikasi lewat surat, padahal teknologi sudah semakin canggih dan orang-orang lebih menyukai penggunaan surel ketimbang surat—yang lama sekali sampai pada penerimanya ini. Namun terima kasih sudah mengingatkanku kalau kita sudah lama tidak saling bertukar sapa dengan cara yang sangat konvensional ini. Surat yang ditulis tangan sangat klasik, dan tentunya lebih tulus daripada surel yang biasa kutulis untuk urusan kerja.

Nggak tahu harus bilang apa lagi sekarang. Tahu nggak sih gue nih udah sampe kesel sendiri ngeliatin jadwal ulangan. I'm thinking back to the (glorious) old days when I care too much. You know, the day when you think getting 90 in physics feel suck. Ketika seorang Karina Yuventia--iya, Karin yang ini--nangis di kamar mandi karena nggak bisa ulangan matematika. Sekarang, ya, nangis aja juga udah nggak sanggup deh. Pengen liburan. Secepatnya.

Jadi kangen banget... Bahkan pas semuanya balik, nggak bisa ngumpul berempat rame-rame :( I hope we will reunite soon.

Sebenernya, ditulis untuk tugas bahasa Inggris. Kerjainnya kilat (pake banget). Jadi, kalau nggak memuaskan..... HAHAHAHA Maklumi yaaa! Selamat membacaa!

Okay, this might be overreacting but I nearly kill myself by banging my head too much on the wall. I lied, okay. Tapi ini semua benar-benar dahsyat sampai saya lupa kapan terakhir kali saya merasa begitu stress. Minggu depan ujian praktik, lalu saya? Di sini. Termangu. Sepertinya baru kemarin, ya, kita semua di sini, merayakan hari pertama memakai seragam putih abu-abu?

Cuplikan bab keempat. Selamat membaca!  P.S. my schedule is killin' me!

Asteya   : Indonesian? Nadira   : Iya. Asteya   : Agak kaget ketemu orang Indonesia di sini. Nadira   : Sama, saya juga. Asteya   : Perantau juga? Nadira   : Sejauh ini bukan. Saya masih tinggal di Jakarta. Asteya   : Oh, saya di London. Nadira is offline 

The title itself is still undecided, but I'm glad I can present you something here after being lazy for months. Here is the prologue. PROLOG - ICHA                         Entah sejak kapan aku mulai mencintai rumah di bandingkan seluruh tempat lain di dunia. Bagiku, pesawat—bahkan jika aku duduk di business class —tetap terasa menyebalkan. Hotel apalagi. Membayangkan ribuan orang lain pernah menghuni kamar itu saja aku sudah risih sendiri, makanya aku sekarang jadi benci jika diajak menginap di hotel bintang lima sekalipun. Mall, yang menjadi salah satu dari sedikit penghiburan orang Jakarta, hanya itu-itu saja walaupun jumlahnya kian menjamur di ibukota.

Kadang aku bertanya, antara aku dan dia, siapa yang lebih menderita. Aku, yang hanya bisa menghabiskan waktu membayangkan saat berdua dengan orang itu tanpa pernah sanggup memandang matanya lama-lama. Atau dia, yang bisa melihat perempuan itu setiap kali dia mau, bisa menyentuhnya tanpa ragu, bisa merangkulnya tanpa takut, tapi diam-diam terpasung perasaannya sendiri karena terlalu cinta. Tunjukkan padaku orang yang lebih menyedihkan daripada orang yang selalu merasa dicintai, namun tidak bisa merasakan cinta dari satu-satunya orang yang ia harapkan bisa mencintainya apa adanya. Sekalian tunjukkan juga, siapakah yang lebih merana daripada diriku, si gadis yang mencintai satu nama yang selalu kupanggil dalam malam-malam sendu itu, namun tak pernah mendengar namaku keluar dari bibirnya sekali saja. Bagiku, malam adalah tempatku mengadu dan menyembunyikan air mata. Dan baginya, malam adalah saat ia menghabiskan menit demi menit merindukan masa lalu. Tanpa seorang pun tahu, k...

“Ya, tapi positifnya adalah we’re having another life after this, kan?”Aku bertanya sambil menghela napas. “Jadi, setidaknya ada harapan kalau kehidupan bisa jadi lebih baik lagi di kehidupan kita yang lain.” “Yea, jadi kalau this life fails, both of us still have another chance, kan?” tanya Rashid, namun ia lebih seperti ingin mencari pembenaran daripada mempertanyakan apakah kalimat yang dilontarkannya benar atau tidak. Pesan pengarangnya: enjoy reading and I hope you like it!

        It’s obvious that Joko Widodo—famously known as Jokowi—is getting majority support for the upcoming president election, if not nationwide, it’s fair to say that he wins the heart of Jakarta and its surrounding areas. The reason why Jokowi got the citizens’ favor is actually simple. He is renowned for his clean image in his political career and from so many cases I have seen, it is safe to conclude that avoiding corruption as much as possible is an important point in winning people’s sympathy.

Today, 21 st March 2014, marked 8 months of my wasted life admiring someone who barely knew I existed. It’s habitual for someone, at least once in their lives, fall in love with someone who doesn’t deserve that feeling. The wise one can manage to get over it and move on, but one eventually can’t get over it, maybe for a while—or maybe for the rest of their lives. I might say I am the one who eventually can’t get over it for a while——I mean, up till now.

There was this saying that by letting someone to play an important role in your life, they would be someone who knows the best way to let you down. The first time I heard it, you know what I thought? I used to think that it was impossible. I mean, if I treasure them so much, then they wouldn't have the heart to let me down in any possible way, would they? They, whom I trust so much, are not supposed to hurt me intentionally, even though they know how to make me feel at the worst, aren't they? But life has prove me wrong. They, in fact, never cares, or maybe if they care , there will come a moment when they decide not to care anymore. Heartless, yes. But I'm wondering my self, Am I still possesing a heart to judge people around me for acting so? I've become more heartless day by day. It's pitiful, but the same question always lingers on my mind, Am I being like this because life has striked me hard or just because I'm tired for possesing one? Whe...

If there were two options: The first one is to walk in the lights, know what you’re facing, and be afraid , The second one is to walk in the dark, never know what you’re facing, but be brave. What would you choose?

                Kalau pindah planet itu memungkinkan, saya pasti sudah melakukannya. Di saat saya berusaha mempertahankan living value yang dikoar-koarkan sampai telinga saya gatal oleh sebuah institusi, baik secara lisan maupun tertulis, saya tidak dihargai. Menyesal telah mempertahankan living value itu? Tidak sama sekali, tapi kalau kecewa atas perlakuan yang saya terima karena mempertahankannya, bisa dibilang iya.

Well actually i took so many photos during SMTOWN Jakarta... But unfortunately those photos are blurry and even this one is also blurry -.- but this is the best photo I could get... I mean.... Lee Sungmin was waving at me... It seemed like he was staring directly at my camera... I also caught his smile... I should've brought my DSLR  or better digicam T^T 

Haeplin during Good Friends Henry during his solo performance this actually was Zhoumi who was singing Goodbye for his solo performance Handsome Haeplin! During Storm Performance! this is.. Sungmin ...... uncontrolled face of Baby Ming Photos were taken by me, using Cella's pocket camera and some of them used Cella's Instax Mini 7s.

Kamis, 26 April 2012. Hari saya melaksanakan tugas sebagai murid Sekolah Menengah Pertama, yaitu belajar. Setiap achievement itu emang ada harganya! Harganya ya perjuangan keras yang dimulai dari Januari silam. Try Out bertubi-tubi, latihan soal bejibun, jam pelajaran tambahan, belom lagi ditambah persiapan diri di rumah. Tapi, toh, semuanya udah lewat! Gue bisa survive! meskipun sempet pilek gak sembuh-sembuh dan dilanda kemalasan yang aduhaiiii -_- Sekarang, yang bisa gue harapkan adalah apa yang menjadi target gue dan semua siswi SMP Santa Ursula yang lain bisa terwujud. Kami punya target dan target itu beda dengan mimpi. Target kita bukan lulus 100% karena lulus itu tanggung jawab, bukan target lagi. Target kita adalah.... Mempertahankan apa yang telah diraih oleh kakak kelas. Dan biasanya, mempertahankan itu memang lebih sulit daripada meraih...